OMG ASHLEY JUDD HAS REACHED THE HIGHEST LEVEL OF BATSH*T YOU GUYS!

OMG ASHLEY JUDD HAS REACHED THE HIGHEST LEVEL OF BATSH*T YOU GUYS!

A clever and competent reader sent me this tweet, and even by Ashley Judd standards (who many of you are aware I loathe with the fury of a billion suns), it’s pure insanity.  Like – I saw it, and didn’t even believe ASHLEY JUDD could be this crazy, and immediately went to research whether or not it’s really something she said.

I’ll let you see the tweet first:

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Yellow is “code” for white?  WHIZZAH WHUZZAH?!?!?

I’m literally the last person on earth who would read something Ashley Judd wrote and think, “Well, that’s simply TOO crazy to be something she actually wrote” but that’s exactly what I thought when I saw this.  I thought it had to be photoshopped, because there’s no way anyone would ever say something this insane out loud.

But then I went to her Facebook page, and saw this.

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HOLY MOTHER OF BATSH*T CRAZY.

There’s so much to unpack and untangle here.

My evening interaction with my white privilege is about emojis.

You guys, Ashley Judd has “evening interactions” with her white privilege.  I. Literally. Cannot.

If you’re other than white, you have to scroll to search for an emoji of color that more closely resembles your experince.

Ashley Judd is notorious for typos, so I’m not even going to comment on her spelling because that’s like the least dumb thing about her post.  She’s behaving as though SCROLLING FOR AN EMOJI OF COLOR is somehow an imposition of such gravity that we should all be positively outraged by it.  And specifically, black people should be outraged.  Because of the horror of having to slide your finger across a screen to select the emoji you want.

Let’s just consider, for a moment, that emojis were created back in 1999 in JAPAN.  Let’s also consider the skin tone of the vast majority of people in Japan.

Now then, after a Japanese dude invented some basic emojis, Steve Jobs took the ball and ran with it.  Right here in America.  Where the population looks like this:

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Let’s just pretend for a moment that Ashley Judd is right about yellow emojis being “code” for white.  Is it any wonder, with the vast majority of Americans being white, that emojis that look like the majority of the population would be listed prior to EMOJIS OF COLOR? I mean, doesn’t that kind of make logical, practical sense?

Ashley actually extrapolates her entire stupid observation about emojis to the plight that people of color must face on a daily basis when she says:

And that gives me a glimpse of what it may be like to be a person of dolor in a white-centric world. Everything set to the standard of whiteness, everything else a variation thereof.

Yes.  She said “dolor.”

And now?  Now she says she wants to be called a “non person of color” so that she can “designate her whiteness” in contrast with people of color. (I still prefer “person of pallor” but that’s because I have a sense of humor and am not an insufferable seahag like Ashley Judd.) Ashley wants to feel enormous guilt about her whiteness.  She wants to feel “negated” even before a conversation gets started.

I’m happy to help her feel negated, but it’s not going to have anything to do with her skin color. It’ll simply be about how intolerable she is when she spews this kind of nonsense.

GAWD.

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